Maggie Lou's Musings, Lessons, and Blessings

I don’t remember when I preached my first sermon, but I do remember when I preached my first Easter sermon. I was chaplain at a juvenile girls’ facility. That spring I experienced a spiritual crisis. A spiritual crisis is, well, a crisis for a vocational minister at any time but in the spring with Easter approaching, it is especially a crisis. How could I help the girls believe in and get excited about the resurrection when I was not sure I believed in the resurrection? At least by the time Easter approached, I had established that I believed in God. Earlier in the spring I had torn apart my belief system and found that the one belief I was unwilling to give up was that God exists. I wasn’t sure who or what God was but I needed God to exist. I believed there was a Power, a Holy Other, some Ultimate Energy or Force, Someone or Something greater than humanity at work in the world—not just on earth but in the entire universe, a universe that was bigger than my mind could comprehend. Though I was familiar with the major world religions, Christianity was the religion I knew best and which offered me a description and belief in God that fit well with my experiences, the experiences that would not allow me to give up my belief in God. That long ago Lent and Easter season, all I could do was to accept on faith that what the Bible, my church, tradition, and my personal experiences taught were true. To put the situation simply, I doubted but I wanted to believe. This was the basis from which I needed to craft my first Easter sermon. I wanted to be open and honest with the girls but I also wanted them to experience the wonder and joy that Easter was supposed to bring. It was then I found Matthew 28: 17, which says “When they saw him, they worshipped him, but some doubted.” Now anyone who grew up in an evangelical church, at least those who grew up in a Southern Baptist Church, are likely able to quote the verses that follow. Matthew 28:18-20 comprise what is called the Great Commission, you know the “Go ye therefore and teach . . ..” passage.

So it was that I developed a sermon about wanting to believe but doubting. Twenty-five years later I don’t remember all or even most of what I said that Easter. I know I told the girls that I wanted to believe but I sometimes doubted. I know I talked about the women and later the disciples coming to the tomb wanting to believe but doubting. I don’t know what else I said that long ago Easter so what follows is my reflection on that passage and other post-resurrection, pre-ascension passages twenty-five years late. (As I look at the Matthew 28:17 passage today, I think it may be more related to the time just prior to the Ascension than the time just after the resurrection. Other post-resurrection passage express doubt and disbelieve so the reflections are valid during the entire forty-day time period.)

Those who went to the tomb wanted to believe, but they doubted. After all, they knew Jesus was dead. Those who placed Jesus in the tomb were in their midst. They had seen his battered body, the blood and bodily fluids flowing from his side but no longer being pumped through his body because his heart was still. Even though at least some of them had witness the raising of Lazarus (John 11:1-44), Jarius’ daughter (Matthew 9:18-26, Mark 5:21-43, Like 8:40-56) and the son of the widow of Nain (Luke 7:11-17), none had seen Jesus raise someone as brutalized as Jesus and Jesus was the one who was dead. Yet, clearly Jesus’ body was not in the tomb. The women had not moved it, the disciples had not moved it, none of the Jewish religious leaders would have done anything to give credence to Jesus’ teaching, especially not to his promise to rise from the death and especially not on the Sabbath. The Romans had nothing to gain by moving the body, unless it was to have a little “fun” playing a very cruel joke on the grieving Jews. Had that been the case, the pranksters would have quickly revealed the hoax. Likely the Romans did not know enough about Jesus’ teachings to even think of such a prank. Still, the tomb was EMPTY!

Thomas is usually the disciple given the title “doubting.” A careful reading of the gospels show that he was not the only doubter. Jesus spent the next forty days showing up from time to time to show his followers that he was alive. They saw Jesus here on earth. They touched him. They talked with him. They ate with him. He cooked for them. Now I might be able to attribute the sightings of Jesus as some sort of mass hallucination brought about by grief and intense hope and desire. I cannot discount touching and eating with Jesus so easily. The disciples did not imagine giving food to Jesus and seeing Jesus eat that food; they did not imagine eating fish Jesus cooked. Jesus was alive. They saw him, yet some doubted.

I am not sure what happened that first Easter. Yes, I believed Jesus was raised from the dead. But, was that enough to account for the powerful witness given by his followers in the years and centuries that followed? Others had come back from the dead, yet their return did not spark a new religious movement. Certainly, Pentecost gave the believers the power and boldness to proclaim the gospel to the world. Still, the believers had to have something to proclaim. Life had changed. They had changed. Jesus’ resurrection was different from other instances when someone came back to life. Others had not defeated death. Others had not overcome hate. Others had not conquered evil. Love was present when Jesus raised someone from the dead because Jesus was present. When Jesus rose from the dead, not only was love present, love won! God won.

Perhaps the most mazing aspect of Easter is that humanity is still on earth 2000 or so years later, still celebrating, still declaring the Good News. I’m not saying it is amazing that we celebrate and declare, I am saying that it is amazing that humanity still exists and, for the most part, still doesn’t get it—doesn’t get how much more powerful love is than hate. God is still loving us. God is still patient with us. God still helps us when we doubt, when we can’t believe our eyes. We tried to destroy God and God let us live! But then isn’t that what Easter is all about. Jesus firmly established the Kingdom of God and invited all who would follow him to inhabit the Kingdom—now and forever.

When doubts begin to assail you, remember the Kingdom of God has come and we who follow Jesus have the privilege of helping God’s Kingdom thrive on earth as it does in heaven. That is how we truly celebrate Easter!